


Sorry

by AchievementHunterCheryl



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-27
Updated: 2016-01-27
Packaged: 2018-05-16 12:43:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5829391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AchievementHunterCheryl/pseuds/AchievementHunterCheryl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jon's life is slowly falling apart, and when he takes drastic measures, it's up to Ryan to save him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sorry

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: Funny enough, this song came on my iTunes as I was putting songs on my iPod. And I suddenly got hit with hardcore angsty Risingwood feels. Song used is ‘Sorry’ by Buckcherry. Ryan and Jon own themselves, I own the idea. Buckcherry owns the song. Enjoy everyone!

Ryan Haywood looked around the penthouse he shared with his friends sadly. He knew that everyone in that room was worried about him, because of his recent relationship troubles. And he knew that everyone had been telling him to fix it, but he couldn’t, because he was stubborn. Jon Risinger made him such a better person, and he knew it, but when Jon had proposed to him, he ran. He wanted to marry Jon, but he knew he couldn’t. Not with the job he’d had. He put his life in danger every day, and he couldn’t do that to Jon. He was brought out of his thoughts by Michael jumping into his face, a phone in his hand.

 

“Dude, your phone is ringing. It looks important.”

 

Ryan shook himself out of his stupor, and looked at the phone, answering it. He wasn’t used to people calling him on his primary phone, just on the countless burners he had. So, when his primary rang, it had to be something important.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Ry-Ryan?”

 

“Jon?”

 

“It’s me, Ry.”

 

“What’s wrong, Jon? Are you okay?”

 

Ryan asked, watching Michael standing off to the side. Ryan could tell that Michael was on high alert, and that’s what made him nervous. But the tone in Jon’s voice made it even worse. It was like Jon had given up. And Ryan hated that, hated knowing that he did that.

 

“I’m not okay, Ry. I haven’t been okay in awhile now. I’m only calling to say goodbye.”

 

“Goodbye, Jon, what are you talking about? Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

“I’m not sure of much anymore, Ry. Living without you isn’t easy. Please don’t blame yourself. Okay? Just remember I love you.”

 

Jon said, hanging up. Jon looked down at the almost empty bottle of tequila he had sitting in front of him, and sighed. His life was over the minute Ryan walked out of his life. He finished off the bottle and smiled, grabbing his car keys and patted his jeans pocket, looking for the note he’d written. He laid it right next to a picture of him and Ryan, and turned his cell phone off. Jon Risinger was going to end his life, and Ryan wouldn’t stop him from doing it…

 

_Oh I had a lot to say_

_Was thinking on my time away I missed you_

_And things weren’t the same_

 

Ryan looked at Michael after hanging up the phone and his whole demeanor had changed. Something in Jon’s voice didn’t match up, and that’s when he realized what Jon had said to him. He hesitated for a split second before moving towards the door.

 

“He’s gonna end it.”

 

“End what? Your relationship? Over you leaving?”

 

“No. His life. He’s gonna end it.”

 

Ryan grabbed the keys to his motorcycle and ran out, dialing the phone. Jon’s phone was going straight to voicemail, which was even more concerning to him, because Jon’s phone was never off. Ever. Jon was a photographer for the newspaper, and he was always on call. Ryan pulled up to Jon’s apartment building and rushed inside. He immediately took the elevator up to the apartment and unlocked the door, rushing in.

 

“Babe? Babe, are you here?”

 

Ryan got no answer. He rushed down the hall to Jon’s office and found the door open. That wasn’t rare, because when Jon wasn’t working, the door was open. He headed down to their bedroom and saw the same thing. Empty. He felt his blood run cold, then he made his way back down towards their living room. And that’s when he saw it. The note sitting on the table, next to Jon’s turned off phone. He grabbed the envelope and started reading the note.

 

_“Hey Love,_

 

_By the time you find this, I’ll probably either be dead or close to it. I need you to know something though. This isn’t your fault, okay? These last few months have been hell for me. I jumped the gun a little bit, allowing myself to propose to you, knowing marriage wasn’t what you wanted. But, I did it, figuring that it’d help us become even stronger. I’m an idiot, it’s what I do. All of my idiocy aside, I love you Vagabond. That’s why I’m doing this. To free us both from the pain. You from the pain of hiding me, and me from the pain of losing you. I’m gonna be somewhere that the stars shine as bright as the California sunshine._

 

_My heart is yours forever,_

 

_Jon.”_

 

He crumpled up the letter and collapsed onto the floor in a fit of tears. He hadn’t heard the door open, not until he felt a pair of arms wrapped around him. He looked up and saw Geoff holding onto him, while Michael, Jack and Ray stood there, watching. Geoff took the note from Ryan’s hand and held him as he cried. Michael gasped as he read the note and grabbed his phone, stepping out to make a phone call. He knew the make and model of Jon’s car, and he had one of their associates tracking it. Michael waited for the call and came back in.

 

“Rye Bread…I know you don’t want to do this right now, but we need to find Jon. We don’t know if he’s dead yet, and you know that. Now, is there anywhere in particular that’s special to you two, that he would go?”

 

“Chilead. We had our first date there. He always used to say…”

 

And that’s when it hit Ryan like a ton of bricks. He struggled out of Geoff’s embrace and grabbed the note that Michael still clutched. He reread one of the paragraphs and gasped, looking back up at Michael.

 

“What did he always say?”

 

“That the stars on the mountain used to shine as bright as the California sunshine. He’s going to do it on Chilead.”

 

Ryan went over to a closet and opened it, reaching up for a box that he knew was at the top on the shelf. He’d opened it and discovered it was empty. Jon had his pistol, and that was even worse. Michael and Geoff had taken over organizing things for Ryan. Ryan turned back around to the boys and shook his head.

 

“No. I have to go on my own. He’ll get spooked if he sees any of you. If I need any backup, I’ll call. I promise.”

 

Ryan said, pocketing his motorcycle keys and walking out. He had a lot of making up to do to Jon, and he wasn’t going to lose him. Not again. He had a lot of apologies to make, and he’d do it.

_Cause everything inside_

_It never comes out right_

_And when I see you cry_

_It makes me want to die_

 

_I’m sorry I’m bad_

_I’m sorry you’re blue_

_I’m sorry about all the things I said to you_

_And I know I can’t take it back_

_I love how you kiss_

_I love all your sounds_

_And baby, the way you make my world go round_

_And I just wanted to say_

_I’m sorry_

 

Jon sat at the ledge of the mountain where he and Ryan had proclaimed their love for one another. He knew that it was over. Ryan hadn’t contacted him, and it was better that way. He finished the other bottle of tequila he’d brought with him and held the pistol to the side of his temple, his finger on the trigger.

 

“Jon. Don’t do it.”

 

Jon heard the voice of an angel from behind him, and he turned around. He saw Ryan standing there and gasped. He had never wanted to see Jon in any position with a gun to his head, and he saw it and started to cry. Jon wasn’t going to waver though. He wasn’t going to not do it. Ryan was only here because he saw the note.

 

“Don’t you get it, Ryan? It’s over for us. I made a mistake, and you left me. And it kills me.”

 

“But killing yourself, Jon? Is that the answer?”

 

“I DON’T KNOW, RYAN?! OKAY! I am so fucking confused. I have a great job that I love, and a great love, too. And now that’s gone. I’ve done everything for you, given up a lot, for you…and now, it’s time to give myself up for you.”

 

“No. Jon, you don’t have to do that. Please.”

 

“It’s too late, Ry. It’s too late for me. Go on.”

 

Jon said, stepping to the ledge of the mountain and pulling the trigger. He fell off the side of the mountain, and Ryan ran after him. He saw Jon’s broken body laying on a ledge and he took out his burner phone. He jumped down and ran to Jon. He started crying and waited for Michael to answer.

 

“Ryan? Did you find him?”

 

“Michael. Get here fast. All I have is my bike. We have to get him to a hospital. He shot himself, but the bullet grazed his head. Please…quick.”

 

Ryan said, hanging up. He grabbed Jon and held him against him, kissing him softly. He heard a chopper in the distance and knew that Michael had mobilized the guys. He’d be grateful for Jack and her ability to fly a chopper later. As soon as he knew that Jon was going to be okay.

 

_This time I think I’m to blame_

_It’s harder to get through the days_

_You get older_

_And blame turns to shame_

_Cause everything inside_

_It never comes out right_

_And when I see you cry_

_It makes me want to die_

 

Ryan sat in the lobby of the hospital waiting for someone to come out and talk to him about Jon. Jon had no family. They’d cut him off when he’d told them Ryan and he were in a relationship. He was the only family Jon had. He glared at Michael and Geoff as he paced.

 

“How the fuck long does it take for someone to come fucking talk to me?”

 

“Ryan…he shot himself. In the head. Grazed or not, it’s still serious. Plus he had a six foot drop. He had to have broken just about everything. And there’s probably a fifty one fifty hold on him.”

 

“He isn’t suicidal!”

 

Ryan said, sitting back down. An hour later, Ryan spotted a doctor heading towards him and he got nervous. He could see the look that the doctor was giving him, and it wasn’t a nice one either. Michael saw Ryan’s body language and knew that he needed to interfere.

 

“Are you the family of Jon Risinger?”

 

“I’m his brother, this is his boyfriend.”

 

Michael said, delivering the line that they delivered anytime anyone of them was in trouble and a hospital stay was necessary. He also knew that Ryan was in no condition to speak to the doctor, so as the unofficial leader, Michael stepped up.

 

“As you know, Jon had a lot of injuries. Not just broken bones, but a gun shot wound to his head. The gunshot missed him. The fall could have killed him just as badly. He got lucky. He has two broken legs and a broken back. He’ll need intensive physical therapy, but he’s going to be okay. He is awake and responsive. We have also decided that we are not placing him on a suicide hold.”

 

“Can we see him?”

 

“One at a time. He’s in room eight fifteen.”

 

The doctor said, shaking Michael and Ryan’s hands before walking away. Michael turned and looked at Ryan, who nodded. Ryan started down the hall and stood outside the door before composing himself. He opened the door and smiled sadly at Jon. Jon turned his head slightly, and winced in pain, before smiling just as sadly.

 

“Hey.”

 

“Hey.”

 

Ryan said, coming over to the bed and sit down next to Jon. He grabbed the hand that was available to him and sighed. Jon looked down at their intertwined hands and immediately pulled it away, before moving his arm slightly towards his other one.

 

“Jon, that’s not fair.”

 

“Don’t touch me if you have no desire to be with me!”

 

Jon yelled, wincing as he raised his voice. Ryan winced, knowing that Jon put himself into some pain yelling at him like that. Ryan moved his arm back over and took his hand, and that’s when he found the words he needed to say.

 

“Jon, you’re everything to me. You know that, right? And leaving you was obviously the stupidest fucking thing I could have ever done. I’m the Vagabond. I’m not supposed to have a heart. I’m the most ruthless killer this side of Los Santos. But you, you make me want to be normal. And you give me that normalcy. The normalcy just to be…Ryan. Not that guy that you see out in the streets every night. And yes, before you…the prospect of marriage scared me. But with you, it’s different.”

 

“Don’t say it if you don’t mean it, Ry. Because I’m not sure I can handle that.”

 

“If there is one thing I know for sure, it’s my love for you. It’s never changed. And it won’t. Jon, I know I’ve hurt you. And I’ll spend a thousand lifetimes making it up to you. You have a long road of recovery time ahead of you, and I’m gonna be there, with my love. That is, if you’ll have me.”

 

Jon looked up at Ryan and nodded slightly. He knew that he loved Ryan. And he knew that Ryan loved him. And it made him depressed to see him not there every day, but he couldn’t deny his heart any longer.

 

“Okay. Ryan, don’t you ever leave me again. I mean it. The minute that you have any doubts, you have to let me know. This whole situation sucks. But I meant everything I said. Both here and in that letter. Can you do it? Can you free yourself and be with me completely?”

 

And Ryan knew. He knew right away that he needed to let himself go. To be completely free of any reservations he has about loving Jon and just let them go. And that’s what he did. And felt completely free, like something had been lifted off his shoulders.

 

“I can. I am. I will. Jon Risinger, you’re everything to me.”

 

Ryan said, leaning in to kiss Jon sweetly. Jon smiled into the kiss and realized he’d felt the change. It was less reserved, more open. Ryan pulled back to give Jon some air, and Jon felt himself smiling for the first time in a long time.

 

“Thank you. Now, I want to focus on getting better. Me getting better and us getting better. Deal?”

 

“Deal.”

 

“Hey! Michael. Don’t listen to the doctors! You can come in too!”

 

Michael smiled and walked in, watching Ryan hold Jon’s hand and kissing it softly. That’s when he knew that things were going to be okay. Michael just stood there feeling like he was interrupting a tender moment.

 

“Nah, it’s all good. I’ll come back. You two take a minute.”

 

He said, vanishing out of the room. Ryan smiled and nuzzled Jon, knowing this night couldn’t get any better.


End file.
